The other day Orynthia was clearing the pockets of an item of clothing, which she had evidently not worn for a little while. In the pockets she was surprised to find several small pieces of paper with exotic sounding names written upon them. Her initial confusion then gave way to the realisation that she must have harbouring the remnants of one of our football sweepstakes.

Anyone that has ever watched an important football match in the company of Steve and me, and a large gathering of likeminded people, will be well aware of the benefit that the sweepstake can bring to watching the dullest of games. We try to go for unpredictable occurrences, so that everyone who has a player’s name in their hand really does have a chance of winning something. We normally like to have prizes for the first and last people to score. As that keeps the interest up for the 90 minutes, in addition we always have a prize for the first player to require medical treatment, sometimes the first or last player to be booked. For matches that have a particular historical theme, we may throw in the name of player from a previous era that could be mentioned in the commentary. For instance, if England were playing Germany, it would be quite normal to pull the name Geoff Hurst from the hat, even though the esteemed Mr Hurst has not kicked a ball in anger for well over 20 years. It just takes a mention from John Motson and your initial stake money will be heading back to you quicker than you can say, "some people are on the pitch….".
My favourite though was in a F.A. Cup final a few years ago, when we decided to acknowledge the age old tradition, of the lid of the F.A. Cup being used as an item of natty headwear by a member of the victorious team. This time the excitement of the sweepstake would not been concluded until someone could claim a pound, because their man had placed the valued piece of silverware upon their sweat stained skull. That particular year Manchester United won the trophy, which was duly passed around the excited players. We oohed and aahed as the lid suffered a succession of near misses. At last it reached the often profligate Andy Cole, he raised the lid towards his head…. The owner of slip of paper bearing Mr Cole’s name yelled in anticipation, only for the typical Andy Cole moment to happen, he actually managed to miss the top of his head and crash the lid into his ear!! Groans and laughter all around the room. Credit though to Andy Cole, he was able to compose himself and at the second attempt managed to crown the cranium, as we all collapsed in fits of laughter.

Anyway, on a rather macabre level we did think that it would have been highly amusing if Orynthia had been found murdered, whilst having the name of some of the worlds finest footballers in her pocket. Obviously this list of names, in true Agatha Christie style, would provide a convenient list of suspects for P.C. Plod to work his way through. You can imagine the conversation. "Now then Mr Ronaldo, can you tell me why Mrs Orynthia Thomas would have a piece of paper in her pocket, bearing your name, on the night she was murdered?"