Yesterday at work, I took a bit of chance by sending the following email to my new workmates;
Hi gang,

Some of you will know that it's my birthday tomorrow (it's going to be pretty weird not to be a teenager anymore, but I'm sure I'll get used to it), sadly I won't be in work to celebrate with you all!

Consequently, today has become my unofficial birthday in this, our exciting new workplace. Traditionally this would be the time for me to bring in mountains of cakes and other delicious sweet and sticky things for us all to make pigs of ourselves. However, I may not be alone in feeling that I may have already topped the EEC quota for mince pies and other pastry and sugar rich delights. The clincher for me was seeing the team from The Guinness Book of Records in the car park yesterday (only 1 more box and we've beaten a 60 year old record apparently).

So, in the biggest breach of office protocol since David Blunkett helped that visa request on it's way, I've decided to forego the traditional gut busting, spot inducing delights and bring in a variety of fruit for you all to nibble on. I'm sorry if this disappoints anyone, I'm sure that normal service will be resumed at the next birthday.

Wishing you all health, wealth and happiness over Christmas and the new year,

Tom

PS. Fruit is not a toy and can potentially be dangerous, so please keep the Banana skins away from Mark!